Finding someone you can connect to and feel at ease with is great, but having the chance to date them makes it magical. Then things get serious and you plan on moving the relationship to the next level, but you find out you actually weren’t on the same page, then the magic disappears.
She says she likes you, but she just isn’t ready to commit yet.
Commitment in relationships presents itself in various ways. Sometimes, it could mean marriage, and other times, it simply is exclusivity or saying your first I love yous — the assurance that you won’t be seeing anyone else but each other, in a romantic light.
But the thing is, commitment doesn’t come to people in pairs.
Sometimes it doesn’t come to certain people at all. Which is why it’s crucial not to assume a committed relationship is bound to happen without assurance that she is ready for it too.
It matters — and saves you from the heartache — to observe and ask yourself these questions to see if she’s ready to commit before asking her to settle in a long term relationship with you.
Does she prioritize spending time with you?
How she chooses to spend time with you reflects how serious she is about you.
If she chooses to see you rather than spend time with her friends, or do anything else, practically means she’s choosing you. This might be her way of making you feel and letting you know you’re already a priority in her life.
Prioritizing you also means she wants and is always there for you during the “big moments” in your life. Recently got a promotion? Your birthday? Your parent’s birthday? She will be dedicated to celebrating these with you, just to make you feel valued and that she values any time spent with you.
Is she unguarded around you?
This doesn’t mean she’s been faking herself all this time. While spending time getting to know each other, she is also genuinely being herself, this doesn’t mean she had been unguarded all the time around you.
Besides, you’re still supposedly in a period where your top priority is impressing each other. Being a proper lady, always looking her best and acting her best — sure, that’s a part of who she is — but not who she is entirely.
We all have flaws, secrets, those annoying habits we don’t want anyone to know.
But once she lets her guard down around you, where she’s already more open, she will become more sincere in expressing herself and less of her trying to look her best and impressing you. She will become comfortable sharing her intimate thoughts and letting you in on her vulnerabilities.
Are her actions still confusing you?
They say women are confusing. But maybe it’s because she’s intentionally making you confused as a test to whether or not it’s worth being in a relationship with you.
But once she makes up her mind about being ready to commit, every woman will make sure she stops complicating the situation. She won’t test you anymore nor give you mixed signals. Instead, she’ll be “subtly-direct” about what she honestly thinks of your relationship and what she truly feels.
Women aren’t just confusing, they’re also complicated.
Her body language should become much clearer and intentional when she’s ready to commit. Whether it’s a kiss goodbye, or as simple as holding hands, trust that she will be discreetly trying to initiate them.
Physical contacts such as these build a connection. And her initiating these or doing them frequently should be a sign that she’s trying to make or is testing a much deeper connection between you two already.
Has she ever tried to discuss the future with you?
The majority of women can be timid and reserved when it comes to expressing their feelings, but this doesn’t mean they can’t be leaving you hints every now and then.
Observe her actions.
Has she been spending a whole lot of time talking about her friend’s relationship or marriage? Perhaps when you’re both watching movies, does she ever so subtly comment on how cute the couple looks with how “in love” they are?
If so, then she might just be ready to move forward with your relationship.
While the future is in fact still pretty far off, a woman who’s ready for commitment is already advancing time in her mind. She will make it clear that she wants you to be a part of her future, and her in yours. This honesty and being straightforward about wanting to be with you is a clear indication that she is ready to commit.
Has she introduced you to important people in her life?
Meeting her grandparents, parents or even introducing you to her friends is a pretty big deal when it comes to relationships.
This does not only mean that she’s confident you will impress the people close to her, but also indicates that she’s ready to move to the next level of your relationship. Introducing you to her family and friends wouldn’t have crossed her mind if she believed you and the connection you two have isn’t going to last for a long while.
Is she ready to merge your lives together?
Once you’re in a committed relationship, you must be willing to fully accept someone in their life and routines. This includes connecting with your family and friends, getting to know your hobbies, and culture.
Sure, these matters might have already come up in conversations during dates but the difference when they’re ready to commit is on the level of their interest. Instead of simply knowing these matters in detail, she will invest in time and effort to experience or try them for herself.
You don’t commit to someone just because you’re afraid of being single your whole life. At the same time, you don’t want to force a connection, and pressure someone to enter a committed relationship with you just because you already want to.
Commitment should come naturally. Else, you will feel trapped in the relationship. Not everyone is claustrophobic, but nobody wants to feel trapped as well. Especially in relationships that don’t feel satisfying.
Commitment is a two-way street, as much as it is a mutual decision. So, before you express wanting to commit with her, make sure she is just as ready as you. Observe her for these signs, and once you’re quite sure, don’t waste any more of your time and ask her.
